We're all expected to be good at things. That's the whole point, really. Just a few short years after our first birthday, we are thrust into an environment so we can start to learn how to be good at things. If your mother is anything like my mother, she was trying to give you a leg up in the delivery room, if not the womb.
There is also a whole lot of conditioning to help us love the feelings of being good at something and despise those associated with being bad at it. This is why a child gets up and keeps running: they have no association with what a good runner looks like. They just want to run.
The only time a child usually starts fussing after a task is when an adult rushes in and makes it obvious that the task wasn’t executed properly.
We get a rush from proving we’re good at things. Feeling like we’re bad at something even for a short time evokes shame, like failing an exam, not getting called back for a job, or not being selected for that big project.
But no one seems to tell us is that we’ll be bad at things before we’re anywhere close to being good at them.
When humans are new to things the chances of them being good at them are slim to none. But our conditioning takes hold and we hate the shame of potentially being bad so much that we usually give up before the breakthroughs.
We all need to get comfortable with being really bad at things if we ever plan to add new and useful skills to our repertoire.
There is also this myth that the things we're supposed to be good at will come easily to us. Of course there are things we are all predisposed to for many different reasons. I like to think of this as talent. However, talent alone isn't enough for success.
Talent needs to be powered by skills and skills take time.
The first phase of becoming good at anything is being really abysmal at said thing. It’s non-negotiable. So, if you’ve just started learning something new and you feel like a complete failure because you're so bad at it, breathe easy. It happens to the best of us.
Imagine if you gave up on writing in a straight line, the multiplication tables, or riding a bike.
You will get better. When you do get better, find the next thing that makes you despise it because you're so bad it. Teach yourself to be comfortable being bad...until you become GOOD!