Adulting 101: How to gain independence from your parents as an adult

Being independent isn’t something that’s easily achieved. It takes work, time and money to get to a place where you don’t necessarily need anyone else.

Image: WOC in tech chat 

Image: WOC in tech chat 

 

We all need human interaction - friends and family - but it’s critical that we only have people in our lives that we want, not need there. On average, 60% of parents provide financial support for their adult offspring, which is becoming the norm with greater monetary pressures for millennials.

Being independent reveals a lot about who are and what your relationships mean to you. When you no longer need to depend on someone, how often do you speak to them? How do you treat them? Being independent isn’t just a way for you to feel accomplished, but also a way to build character and better relationships with those in your life.

So how do you become independent from your parents and others?

 

These 10 things will help you become a fully independent adult, that doesn’t need their parents to live day to day:

Get your own place. The first step to becoming an adult is moving out of your parents’ home. If you need to live with your parent because you’re a recent grad or you’ve had a life altering event, that’s ok. But if you’re someone who really wants to be independent, you can’t call yourself that until you learn to live on your own. Having your own apartment teaches you about paying things on time, keeping a home clean, and just how much all those little gadgets in the kitchen at home cost. You’ll be much more responsible after signing your own lease for sure.

Have your own car. Having a car is also a big responsibility. There’s the upkeep and maintenance of the vehicle but also keeping up with your insurance or car note. If you’re trying to build credit, having paying rent and car insurance are some bills that can help you do so. Also, not having to depend on anyone to drive you around will bring more peace than you think. Not to mention lessons that are learned from saving for and picking out a new car for yourself.

Find financial freedom. Financial freedom may be the key to getting your own place and buying a car. Moving requires a lump sum of money to get your apartment keys so you’ll have to have enough in savings to sign a lease. Be sure to save 10% of your income and have six months’ worth of expenses saved up before making any big moves.  

Gain emotional independence. Get to a place where you can make decisions, big or small, on your own without input from everyone. It may be hard to make choices without consulting your best friend or partner but it’s necessary to become an independent adult. Emotional independence implies that you don’t need to rely on anyone else to feel or think for you.

Do activities alone. Don’t be afraid to go to the movies or to a restaurant by yourself. There’s nothing wrong with flying solo to an event or any activity, including shopping, concerts, parties, etc. Once you can do small things like go to events alone, you’ll be able to travel alone.

Travel alone. Traveling solo is the new thing in travel and tourism. There are plenty of group created for single travelers to explore a new place together with folks they don’t even know. This isn’t a dating concept, but it teaches you that you don’t need your entire group of friends to go to another country if they aren’t up for it.

Create a personal brand. How does creating a personal brand make you more independent? Putting the effort into creating your brand, whether it be personal or business, means independence from your friends, family and other associations. Building a brand means your crafting your own looks, becoming a leader and even making some collaborations that could bring in income.

Let go of toxic relationships. Learning how to deal with breakups in a healthy way will help you with your emotional independence. Although you may be in a happy relationship, are there any toxic people in your life that need to be removed? Remove anything or anyone from your life that isn’t bringing happiness, and work on living without them.  

Learn new skills. You don’t need to have a degree to get into a new industry nor do you need a man to make some home improvements. Learn a new skill that will make you more independent one way or another. If you don’t want to have to depend on a graphic designer, get on Lynda.com and learn Photoshop yourself.

What does independence mean for you?